I'd rather play at hug o'war

Everyone who has seen POTC: At World's End should go read inlovewithnight's Will-centric Limbo. It's gorgeous, for one. The imagery as well as the language, and I love Will's quiet acceptance of his fate because it's SO Will, even if I want to shake him for it.

There's also this old (post-DMC) but absolute goody from kieyra: The Tale of Saint William the Martyr. It's Jack and Elizabeth and Will and a mix therein. What if Elizabeth really did want Jack? Will and Elizabeth, both broken and wasted and pirates through and through. Again, the language and the dialogue make pretty, pretty. Lovely and hurty and I love it like whoa, even a year later.

And this is all I have to say about Six Apart's current layover in Stupidia: join fandom_counts. As of this writing, the comm is up to 25,000+ members, and fucking hell, it warms my cockles.

The York's response when I showed her a photograph of the Rothko sold for $73 million dollars:

"SEVENTY-THREE MILLION DOLLARS? On Design on a Dime, they could have put that together for $30 dollars." Pause. "SEVENTY-THREE MILLION DOLLARS? SEVENTY-THREE MILLION DOLLARS?!"

Seriously. The York, she never disappoints.

MAN. My salad is AWESOME, people. Fresh broccoli, cucumbers, grape tomatoes, and a nice side of baby carrots. GUH. I found myself singing, "I loooove fresh broccoli. Lalala..." But then I'm a hummer when my food is especially delicious.

Kurt Vonnegut died yesterday.

I am verklempt, people.

I've been looking at jobs at CareerBuilder.com for the last couple of months. I have a few job searches and the site will send me emails weekly with new job listings that fall within those searches. One of them is, of course, entertainment-related.

There's this one group that continually advertises for positions like celebrity assistants (the appeal might be great, but my dignity is apparently greater) and the like. Mostly it's these no-name companies advertising positions in sales and marketing that are sort of connected to the entertainment industry. But only if you squint. Really hard. Nothing that would appeal to me, nor am I qualified for any of it either since I've spent the last ten years in health care and research.

Anyway, CBS (the first job posting I've seen from them) has this position available that combines producer and editor. Their oh-so-smart name for this combo? Preditor. Yeah, it isn't quite as mortifying as Tobias's analrapist, but, CBS dudes, THINK. Read it out loud a few times before, you know, deciding and all that.

( How I Met Your Mother )

I ordered food from Hungry's today. HUGE mistake - well, until I finally got back to my desk and started eagerly shoveling down my beloved Black Bean Orzo Pasta Salad and cup of Black Bean with Pico de Gallo soup. Oh, and peed. Holy hell, I had to pee. It's just the Village is ridiculous during the lunch hour. Narrow streets coupled with small parking lots and loads of people (rich ones at that, ones who couldn't possibly care less that they are shitty, entitled drivers) = a pissy rubykate. I just need to stick to my "Only after 1 PM" rule when it comes to the Village from now on, but my hunger was like an angry, bitter thing since I didn't have dinner last night and a small breakfast this morning.

I did see Dr. Pest over there. He was having lunch with some lady who I know isn't his wife, but I'm sure it was a drug rep. There was no hanky panky, but he was certainly being charming with his Alan Alda voice (seriously, he sounds exactly like him, which is amusing considering I think AA is kind of a dick and a know-it-all. It's fitting) and his kickin' it old school preppy Penny Loafers. He is one of those people that is beyond abrasive and ten miles past out there yet totally brilliant, which is the only reason he's kept his job here all these years as he never curbs his tongue when it comes to the doctors here in our department or the so-called failings of this institution. (He once accused another doctor and his research nurse of being "Commies." People, I could not make this shit up if I tried.)

Then there was the guy who was cute (GORGEOUS eyes) but packaged in the way of Gael García Bernal, i.e. pocket-sized, and the sort of cute pink polo guy who had no problem staring and not smiling – a giant-sized peeve of mine, which has equal parts to do with the annoyance of someone (mostly guys in my experience) who just stare and stare like some pervert and my being Texas born and bred. (Something you should know should you ever find yourself in Texas: if you don't smile or make eye contact or at least greet someone [especially in response], you will be deemed a snooty, stuck up asshole/bitch [trust me, that's what everyone called me when I first started here and it was simply because I was shy]. Or a foreigner [and that means Yanks, too]. It's just a thing down here.)

And now I’m going to finish up lunch and start back on my special project. *WHINE*

So, yeah. We have our issues. I don't like you. In my oh-so-humble opinion, you (and all your weasily little friends, too) are pretty much evil realized in company form and traded publicly. I actually have far less petty reasons for this too, but at the moment? This whole let's decide patient A is really accelerated and not chronic FOUR MONTHS after the patient was put on protocol so now we (and the monitor) are scrambling to put together another casebook from scratch? Yeah, be a little less sucky when we're facing down an FDA visit next week.

Reason #462 why pharmaceutical companies should get sucked into the earth never to be heard from again.

I'm back. Got in Tuesday night. ( Las Vegas, February 2007: a rundown. )

Watched tons of TV since Tuesday night. (I took Wednesday off as a day of recovery.) Heroes managed to make my jaw drop as I was so NOT expecting that ending. Yay. It still manages to surprise me! How I Met Your Mother was also pretty awesome for that ending. ( Cut for spoilers. )

As for Thursday night TV, The Office – WHOA. Holy shit. Poor Jim. Seriously. He can't win for losing. But PAM! Pamela Beesley, you’re getting there and it is an amazing thing to see.

And then it was the end of The O.C., which I have been saving on the DVR for the last several weeks. I couldn't bring myself to watch all the episodes leading up to tonight, but I couldn't not watch the series finale live. It didn't quite hit the levels of Felicity or Dawson's Creek (oh holy God, DC just about killed me. Mom even cried and she hated DC.), but it made me a little weepy. ( Cut for spoilers )

Apparently some douche who will never, ever get laid wrote an op-ed piece he likes to call "satire" regarding rape and how VERY AWESOME rape is for his school newspaper. Strangely enough, people didn't find it funny. Cue the much-deserved backlash against the asshat and the editors of the school newspaper and the resulting wank!

(Of note, I am seriously late to the party as this was discussed on Feministe back on 02-09-07.)

Anna Nicole Smith Dead

HOLY SHIT.

Heh. Del, Del's bro Nah, and I are doing The Lemonade Diet, a.k.a., the Master Cleanse. We decided we needed something to jumpstart our asses back on the right track as well as clearing out all the old shit (HA! I'm funny!).

So Del and I went to Whole Foods Saturday night to pick up the book, the maple syrup (Grade B - must be Grade B), and possibly the ground cayenne pepper. Of course, it's the new year and the holistic section is ALL ABOUT CLEANSING. I swear, fifty-thousandity ways to clear out the ol' bowels and start fresh.

Anyway, so we're standing there, reading the book, when I notice that you're supposed to do this sea salt/water combo and "several elimations will occur." Ominous, no? Del calls me this morning.

Del: "So did you do the salt water?"
Me: "Um, no." GIGGLE. SNERK. "So how many eliminations?" GIGGLE. SNERK.
Del: "FOUR."
Me: "WHEN DID YOU DRINK IT?"
Del: "AT SEVEN THIS MORNING."
Me: Glances at clock. It is only 8:35am. "HOLY SHIT."
Del: "YEAH."

Who knew this diet would be such an adventure? Or that a solid 24 hours of my life would revolve around getting Senna tea (or alternately, Smooth Moves)? We went to three stores trying to find LAXATIVE TEA. Luckily Mr. Lee, Del's daddy, found some Smooth Moves at their Randalls. Laxative tea as the one ring.